Welcome to Cassidy’s Heart

If Someone were to ask me, I would have to confess that this date in my life has not always been a fond memory.

You know those moments where in a split second your entire life changes?

Well, January 5, 2011 was when my “split second” occurred and reshaped, at least in my mind, my entire future. On this day, I had my first “episode”. During an episode, I get lightheaded and hot, then completely collapse. After I collapse, I am left with temporary paralysis in my neck, arms, and legs. Some episodes last minutes while others last hours. At my worst, I had this on going muscle weakness for a week. I would get up out of my hospital bed and walk about 3 steps before collapsing.

It’s taken almost six years for me to be able to accurately interpret how my body feels and what it needs.

As a freshman in high school, I began to watch my world change. I went from healthy and active to having a doctor recommend pulling me out of school and not letting me up more than 45 minutes at a time. Consequently, from that day forward, trying to remain stable and healthy has continued to be a daily struggle. It impacts most decisions I make. Like, how close to park to the door, should I drive, what jobs to apply for, what college to attend, what to study, which trips to take, what foods to eat, how late to stay out. It impacts a great deal of my life.

But y’all! Let me tell you. We have a God whose reach is far greater than any trial or circumstance that try to weave into every area of our lives.

His love is greater. His love is stronger. In fact, even now more than ever, I am convinced of one resounding point: God is still good and He is worthy of our worship. Throughout this season of weakness, He has shown himself strong and faithful. He has walked beside me every step of the way, cheering me on and speaking truth to my heart.

When I was in the sixth grade, I was sitting in History class as my teacher was going over a lesson about Indonesia. I distinctly remember her telling us that Christians in Indonesia were being persecuted for their faith. And as weird as it sounds, it was in that moment that I felt the stirring of the Holy Spirit inside of my young heart call me to missions (talk about bad timing). The summer before my freshman year of high school, I went on my first international mission trip to Honduras. It is safe to say that I fell head over heels in love with the country, the people, the work. I experienced God in a way I never had before here in the States. I felt so alive.

When I started my freshman year, I was given the opportunity to go to Caribbean Christian Center for the Deaf in Jamaica. After praying and discerning that the Lord would have me go, I raised the money and learned Sign Language. After not being able to speak to any of the children in Honduras, I was determined to be able to communicate with these children at the deaf school. Suddenly, one month before I was to leave on this exciting adventure, I had my first episode.

My parents of course were distraught over trying to figure out what was wrong with their daughter and no answers were coming to light. One day after school, I got in my dad’s truck and I was in tears. My episodes were getting worse and I was positive that my parents would never let me go. They would be crazy to let me leave. My dad looked at me and said, “Cassidy, you have prayed and received confirmation that you should go, right?” Crying, I shook my head yes. “Well”, he said, “God never said getting there would be very easy”… I boarded the plane for Jamaica in February; a weak and excited mess.

I have since been back to Jamaica nine times and been to places in each of the 14 parishes. Little did I know that someone on that beautiful island would need a little girl who becomes randomly paralyzed to travel to their country to remind them that our God is the God of the impossible. As a result, I have grown to love Jamaica and the people there. Everything about it; the food, the music, the scenery, the people. I have learned so much from these beautiful people.

Little did I know, God was showing me that in light of His power, my weakness is always going to be irrelevant.

This is the reason for Cassidy’s Heart; that you might be encouraged, inspired, and empowered. I am going to stand on this little soap box of mine and share how what I thought was the “reshaping” and derailing of my future was really God’s sovereignty directing and taking control. We can live in Victory during trials such as these, my friends. If you’d let me, I’d like to walk alongside you cheering you on. But most of all, I would love to encourage you.

God took my paralysis and redeemed it for His Glory. He can do the same for whatever you are facing today.

Your trial does not have to be your defeat. God took my paralysis and redeemed it for His Glory.Click To Tweet

Read More:

6 Things I Learned In 6 Years of Illness 

3 Lies I Believed About My Body

God Will Never Waste Your Pain